Infant Loss Following Poor Prenatal Diagnosis
Siena: Turning Towards Joy
Named after St. Catherine of Siena, the parish we joined the Catholic Church through following our daughter Kenna’s stillbirth, Siena was a moment of joy in deepest sorrow for our family.
Diagnosed with no aminiotic fluid in only the 18th week of pregnancy, Siena lacked the neccessary components to develop her lungs properly. Wrought with other complications, we spent 4 months as a family anticipating her death while praying for a miracle.
And a miracle she was. Born at 37 weeks, she lived for 105 minutes most of which was spent in the arms of those who loved her best. A few years later, we learned that St. Catherine of Siena’s family nicknamed her little Euphrosyne, a Greek name meaning Joy. Siena taught us to fight passionately for those we love and to unappologetically put family first…moving always towards joy.
Looking for spiritual comfort in your time of loss?
Blessed Is the Fruit of Thy Womb: Rosary Reflections on Miscarriage, Stillbirth, and Infant Loss was written for you. It is my sometimes raw, hopefully encouraging walk through the journey of pregnancy and infant loss grief as it relates to the story of our savior- through the eyes of a mother.
Unleashing a passion…
Regardless of the time that has passed since experiening pregnancy and infant loss, rarely does a day pass that I do not remember the influence of these tiny souls on my faith and my family. Through intense suffering, our family has grown closer to God and closer to each other.
We did not do this, however, by pretending that our babies did not exist or were not important. It was only walking through the suffering and asking God to accompany us that we could rest in confident assurance of His mercy for us and for our unborn children.
That grace is not just for my and for my family, but for yours. I tell my babies’ stories to give you courage and permission to share yours.
When I speak to parishes and groups, I am often approached by men and women long past their child bearing years who recall, with tears in their eyes, the tender life that passed on too quickly some 50 or even 60 years ago.
The stories still matter!
Your babies never stop mattering. They matter to you because they were yours. They matter to God because they are his and so are you.